52. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, October 22nd, 8:00am
Pierre and Martin

 

Pierre: So I said to him, “How in the freaking hell can you say there’s enough light in here?

Martin: No! You didn’t really, did you?

Pierre: I did! And you should have seen the look on his face!

Martin: What did it look like?

Pierre: I have no idea! It was too dark!

 

Next stop: Thursday, October 23rd, 5:00pm

51. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, October 21st, 2:00pm
Hillary (and Sean)(and Drommen)

 

Hillary sits at the window. Sean takes a seat beside her.

Sean: Hey.

Hillary stares out the window.

Sean: What the fuck’s up with you lately?

Hillary: Nothin’

Sean: You’re waitin’ for that creepy guy.

Hillary: He’s not creepy, he’s nice.

Sean: What’s his name?

Hillary: Whatever. Jake. Whatever.

Sean: Yeah well, I heard he likes to expose himself on the bus.

Hillary: (turns to him) Who told you that?

Sean: (shrugs) Does it matter? The guy’s a creep.

Hillary rests her head against the window and looks out.

Sean: What do you say we just go get fucked up?

Hillary: Not interested.

Sean: Suit yourself. But don’t go whinin’ to me if he asks … Hey, isn’t that him? (points at Drommen, boarding the bus)

Hillary: (sits up straight) Yeah.

Sean: Should I leave the two of you alone? (smiles) Maybe he’ll show you his wiener.

Hillary: Maybe you’re a wiener.

Drommen, carrying a grocery bag, walks up the aisle and stops in front of Sean.

Drommen: (to Hillary) Hi Jessica.

Sean: (looks up at Drommen) Hey asshole.

Drommen holding his hands behind his back, leans down and says something in Sean’s ear. Sean gets up and moves to the rear of the bus and Drommen takes his seat.

Hillary: What did you say to him?

Drommen: (holds open his bag for her to look inside) I just offered him a sausage.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, October 22nd, 8:00am

Author’s note: These Scenes are written independently, occasionally featuring the same character from a former scene. Please click on the names in the tags to follow a character’s story. (Hillary) (Sean) (Drommen)

50. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Monday, October 20th, 2:00pm
Felix (and Fiona)

 

Felix sits in the aisle seat. Fiona takes the seat behind him.

Fiona: (blows nose) Oh, that cold out there sure makes the nose run.

Felix: (nods and turns his head part-way around) Mmm…

Fiona: I was talkin’ to a lady out at the bus stop. She wasn’t even wearing a coat!

Felix pulls a bottle of hand sanitizer out of his pocket and cleans his hands.

Fiona: I s’pose there’s people like that who just don’t feel the cold. Wonder that they don’t catch something though.

Felix: (turns part-way around) It is.

Fiona: Hey, are you one of them COD people or whatever it is?

Felix: OCD. Like Howie Mandel.

Fiona: You know, you can catch a cold just by sitting ten feet away from someone? We’re sitting closer then that. (smiles)

Felix gets off the bus.

 

Next stop: Tuesday, October 21st, 2:00pm

stasis

nights
when i cant be bothered
to capitalize or apostrophize
i just wantwish
to be curled up on the couch
in your arms once again
going down
for hours
to sleep beside your faithful snores
your heat
and to wake to the pulsing
of the alarm
rocking
out the 69s
and 70s
and then
youre gone once again
leaving behind your scent
and me
without as much as an apostrophe
or a care to pinky a shift

49. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Sunday, October 19th, 10:00am
Madigan and Missy

 

Missy: Mommy, what’s a “seatful prick”?

Madigan: That’s DEceitful, and you don’t say the word “prick.” It’s not nice. What were you doing awake at eleven last night anyway?

Missy: I woke up when Shadow barked. Who were you talking to?

Madigan: Never you mind.

Missy: Was it Uncle Ken?

Madigan: (regards her daughter) What makes you think it was Uncle Ken?

Missy: Oh just ‘coz Aunty Barb was calling him the same thing.

Madigan: And when did you hear that?

Missy: The day you went to work and I stayed at Aunty Barb’s place.

Madigan: Two weeks ago?

Missy: (shrugs) I guess.

Madigan: Did you hear anything else?

Missy: (nods) Uh-huh.

Madigan: What else did you hear?

Missy: Aunty Barb told him that he was no better than her sister. Isn’t you her sister Mommy?

Madigan: Yes. (gazes out the window)

Missy: Are you “seatful” Mommy?

Madigan: Not as much as Aunty Barb is.

 

Next stop: Monday, October 20th, 2:00pm

Author’s note: These Scenes are written independently, occasionally featuring the same character from a former scene. Please click on the names in the tags to follow a character’s story. (Missy) (Madigan)

48. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, October 18th, 1:00pm
Captain Longsight (and Zoey)

 

Captain Longsight sits at the window. Zoey takes a seat beside him.

Captain Longsight: (pulls binoculars from bag and peers through them out the window) Holy Shamoly!

Zoey: What?

Captain Longsight: There’s a crime going on down that sidestreet!

Zoey: (holds hand out expectantly for the binoculars) Can I see?

Captain Longsight: There’s no way you can see it.

Zoey: Of course I can the bus isn’t going anywhere.

Captain Longsight: It’s not that. It’s just I have amazing powers of being able to see long distances.

Zoey: (laughs) Of course you can. You have binoculars.

Captain Longsight: Oh these? (holds up binoculars) These don’t matter. I’m Captain Longsight. I was born with extraordinary powers of farsightedness.

Zoey: Soo… why do you carry binoculars?

Captain Longsight: Well… You wouldn’t understand.

Zoey: Try me.

Captain Longsight: They were a gift.

Zoey: Kinda like your gift of farsightedness?

Captain Longsight: N0! Like a birthday gift.

Zoey: Huh. So, Captain Longsight, do you fight crime with your superpowers?

Captain Longsight: (pulls cell phone out of pocket and smiles) No, I call the cops!

Zoey: Hooray. (changes seats)

 

Next stop: Sunday, October 19th, 10:00am

Author’s note: These Scenes are written independently, occasionally featuring the same character from a former scene. Please click on the names in the tags to follow a character’s story.  (Zoey)

47. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Friday, October 17th, 6:00pm
Drommen (and Donald)

 

Drommen sits at the window. Donald sits beside him.

Donald: Hi.

Drommen: Hello.

Donald: Can I ask you a personal question?

Drommen: I suppose.

Donald: If a guy likes mostly women, but there’s just one guy that he’s attracted to, do you think that makes him gay?

Drommen: There’s nothing wrong with attraction. It’s what you do with it.

Donald: Okay, so say this guy is attracted to this other guy and they actually sleep together a couple of times. Does that make him gay?

Drommen observes Donald silently.

Donald: I’m asking for a friend. Of course.

Drommen: Of course.

Donald: So do you think my friend is gay?

Drommen: And he’s attracted to girls?

Donald: Yeah.

Drommen: Maybe he’s bisexual.

Donald: Hmm… Maybe.

Drommen looks out the window.

Donald: Hey, can I ask you something else?

Drommen: Sure.

Donald: Do you mind if I masturbate?

Drommen stares at him wide-eyed.

Donald: Just as an experiment. To see if, you know, I get excited sitting beside another guy.

Drommen: (still wide-eyed) I thought it was your friend.

Donald: IT IS! The experiment is for him.

Drommen: I don’t know if I feel comfortable with that. But there’s a guy who rides the bus once in a while. You could ask him.

Donald: Really? What does he look like?

Drommen: You can’t miss him. He wears fake fangs.

 

Next stop: Saturday, October 18th, 1:00pm

Author’s note: These Scenes are written independently, occasionally featuring the same character from a former scene. Please click on the names in the tags to follow a character’s story.  (Drommen) (Donald)

46. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, October 16th, 8:00pm
Edward (and The Darkness)

 

Edward sits at the window. The Darkness sits beside him.

Edward: (sniffing, turns to The Darkness) Who the hell are you?

The Darkness: I am The Darkness

Edward: No you’re not. I am the darkness.

The Darkness: I am The Darkness.

Edward: No, I am the darkness.

The Darkness: I AM THE DARKNESS!!

Edward: (hisses, showing plastic fangs) I AM THE DARKNESS!!

Both get kicked off the bus.

 

Next stop: Friday, October 17th, 6:00pm

Author’s note: These Scenes are written independently, occasionally featuring the same character from a former scene. Please click on the names in the tags to follow a character’s story. (Edward) (The Darkness)

45. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, October 15th, 4:00pm
Michael (and Agatha)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading. Agatha sits beside him.

Agatha: Hello.

Michael: (glances away from his iPad and smiles)

Agatha: I’m going to my granddaughter’s house for dinner. (gestures to a dish on her lap) I’m bringing the bread pudding.

Michael: (mumbles without looking up) That’s nice.

Agatha: My great granddaughter Kitty will be there. Such a precious thing she is, though the clothes she wears! I never know what children are thinking these days. What’s that thing you’re reading?

Michael: This? It’s an iPad.

Agatha: (sighs) All these new-fangled gadgets. Why, in my day we used to read things like newspapers, and books. We wore things that covered us up and baked our own bread pudding!

Michael: (shrugs and stares at his iPad)

Agatha: (after a few minutes) I’m going to my granddaughter’s house for dinner.

Michael: (rolls eyes) And I bet you’re taking bread pudding.

Agatha: How did you know?

Michael: Lucky guess.

 

Next stop: Thursday, October 16th, 8:00pm

Author’s note: These Scenes are written independently, occasionally featuring the same character from a former scene. Please click on the names in the tags to follow a character’s story. (Michael) (Agatha)

44. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, October 14th, 7:00pm
Jordan and Brandon

 

Brandon: What are you so worried about?

Jordan: (twirls a basketball in his hands) Marissa’s going to be in the stands tonight.

Brandon: Yeah, and?

Jordan: She already thinks I’m a clumsy idiot. What’ll happen if I trip over my own feet?

Brandon: You’re not going to…

Jordan looks at him and squints.

Brandon: Okay, so you might. But some girls like the underdog…

Jordan: (laughs wryly) Yeah, name one.

Brandon: (laughs) Your mom.

Jordan: Hey, my dad got a slam-dunk in the finals at school.

Brandon: And he broke his ankle when he landed.

Jordan: (nods) I wonder if she’ll sign my cast…

Brandon: Don’t!

Jordan: (eyes his friend with a grin) Don’t think she’s worth it?

Brandon: (shakes his head) You’re a fuckin’ nutcase.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, October 15th, 4:00pm