“What if,” I asked my husband as we sipped coffee from our china cups, “coffee contains some sort of secret ingredient that allows the government to read our thoughts.”

“What are you saying, Darling? That now coffee is part of your conspiracy theory? I honestly don’t know why I married you.”

“Now that you mention it, I was thinking the same thing. How could I have married someone who is so… insensitive to the possibility that everything is spying on us?”

“Everything is not… wait. Did you say you were thinking the same thing as I? Put down the cup.”