Fandom Form Letter (tongue-in-cheek)

Dear Mr. [insert name]

Let me start off by saying I’m your biggest fan. The first time I saw you it was like WHOA I’ve got to hear and see everything you’ve ever done because OMG you’re so beautiful!! So I went on Youtube and I must’ve spent like hours that first day watching. Your [insert name] is the absolute best ever!!!!

It’s been about [insert time period] since then and I feel like I know you. We’re like soulmates. I feel like I knew you in a past life or something and whenever I watch an interview with you I’m nodding my head. It’s almost as if I know what you’re going to say next!!! Your words are like heaven to me and we’re so alike it’s just amazing. I know that when we meet you’re going to feel it too.

I’ll be seeing you on [insert date] and I hope you’ll find me in the crowd. We’re meant to be together forever. I know it. It’s like fate or something.

Until then.

I love you forever.


P.S. I’m getting a tattoo with your picture next week! I hope you’ll sign it for me and then I’ll get your signature tattooed too!!! 😀

badge by Doobster @ Mindful Digressions

badge by Doobster @ Mindful Digressions

This post is part of SoCS:

and Love Is In Da Blog:

The Interview

“All right then Mr. Jones, everything looks good. We’ll be contacting you within the next two weeks to let you know if you’ve got the job.”

“Thank you so much. I look forward to hearing from yo…”

“Oh! One other thing. I keep forgetting to ask this question. New protocol and all.”


“Tell me, Mr. Jones. How many times per day do you urinate?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“How many times per day do you urinate?”

“Um… about three?”

“Excellent. We’ll let you know then. Thank you for applying for a job at Google.”