you, inverted

you’re full-on
or not at all
retreat! retreat!
is your frightened motto
screamed in a whimper
of stage-one inversion

A Christmas Wish

a
star
atop a
tree
is
lit
in hope
for the new
year’s growth
and prosperity
with health for all,
for there is nothing on
earth, that one who is true
can wish for more than the joy
and love and peace that is brought
by caring for one’s fellow man, no matter
where
he was
born

The Great Dagmaru

“When I’m on stage, whether I’m making the audience laugh, or scream, or shake their heads in disbelief, I feel happy. When I’m on stage with you doing all these things, I feel content.

“When I’m up there performing magic for their pleasure, I feel elated; I experience their reactions and I am one with them. When you are with me up there beneath the lights, my love, I am one with the universe. I am home.”

~ Stephen Dagmar: The Great Dagmaru
The Great Dagmaru, Book 1: The Magician’s Curse
To be released in June 2017

Discovery (The Dentist – Part 5 of 5)

…continued from here

“Oh! You’re here today. I’m so happy to discover you’re still alive.”

“Why wouldn’t I be, Dr. Spiers?”

“I had this very odd dream that you’d died in all kinds of ways. And that we’d been having a… well, a tryst, you might say.”

Doctor!

“I’m sorry, my dear. Was that inappropriate? Truly, please forgive me.”

“No, that’s all right. I had a similar dream. Say, would you like to go out for a drink later?”

Ahem. I’m not sure my wife would appreciate that. Why don’t we get on with our first appointment. Shall we?”

“Okay. Mrs. Horner is coming in again this morning.”

“Is she having her teeth replaced?”

“That’s right.”

“And did you put them all in the right order?”

“What… order? They’re a pair of false teeth.”

“Just checking.”

Unfortunately (The Dentist, Part 2 of 5)

…continued from here…

“Oh my God! You scared me silly. You’re the man who knows sign language, aren’t you? Wait… How did you get in here?

“You’ve been here all night? Waiting for the novocaine? What novocaine? OH, the novocaine for your filling. Now I remember. I’m surprised you’re still sitting in the chair. Why ever didn’t you just get up and walk out? Your wheelchair? It must be that one right there in the corner.

“Oh well, at least you didn’t have to drive in all that horrible weather outside. What’s that? Yesterday was your birthday and you missed seeing your family for the first time in… how many years? Well, we’d better hurry up and get this tooth filled so you can get out of here then. Now, where was I? Oh yes, the novocaine. I’ll be right back.

“I beg your pardon? I didn’t see what you signed there. Don’t bother with the novocaine? All right then. It’s your funeral.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did I say that out loud? I forgot, you can hear. What I meant was, having your tooth filled without any freezing might hurt a little. Now let’s see. Oh right, you have a bit of rotting going on down in the root. I think I’m going to have to take out the tooth beside the bad one. What’s that? I already did? Hmmm. Oh no. I have some bad news. Unfortunately it seems I took the wrong one out. I’ll just get my pliers here… Now where did they go. I can’t find anything since my hygienist left. Just up and quit, she did.

“I said I fired her yesterday? I wonder why I said that. All right. Here are the pliers. Wha… Where did you go?

“Hey, you! You in the wheelchair! Come back here! You haven’t paid me yet!”

…continued here

Moody

She accuses me all the time of being moody. I’ll show her.

The mood is set. The candles are lit around the steaming, lavender-scented bath, the wine is poured, and the dinner is warming, ready for when she gets out. I’m already in the bath waiting for her to come ho…

There she is! I hear her key in the door! And… who’s she talking to? She brought her good-looking boss home again?

She thought I was moody before! I’ll show her!

madness

awe-inspiring words
put together just right
cause madness
can give birth to a thousand, a million other words
if placed before the eyes
or whispered in the ear
of a maddened artist…
these words
this well-hung quote
laps up all the juices
and spits them back
into the maddening wilderness
of the writer’s mind

Here

“Here we are again.”

Yep, here we are again.

“What do you want to do?”

I dunno. The world is our oyster.

“We can do anything we want?”

Anything at all.

“Can we unbury you so you can hold my hand one more time?”

No. We can’t do that.

“I miss you.”

I miss you too, my love.

Flee – A Limerick

There once was a man who would flee
A store with an armful for free
He dodged the alarm
And with oodles of charm
Sent the cops on a goose-chase, yippee!

Martyr

“Okay guys, I’m going in. Gonna take one for the team.”

“But Timmie, you’ll die!”

“Yeah, Timmie! If you break away, chances are you’re not gonna make it!”

“Gordon, Freddie, it’s okay. It was nice knowin’ ya.”

“Noo!! Timmie, nooo!!”

“Oh well, there goes one of the good ones. Aaaand SMOOSH! Okay, who’s up next? Ralph? Ralph? Come on, Ralph, you can beat that fly swatter!”

“Yeah, Ralphie! You’re the quickest one there is!”

“”Okay guys, I’m going in. Gonna take one for the team.”

“But Ralphie, you’ll die!”

“Yeah Ralphie! Or maybe you’ll make it! See ya soon, Ralphie! Aaaand SMOOSH! Man, it’s good these guys have a short memory. Who’s up next? Hey, Marty!”

***
The Daily Post: Martyr